Seniors

A Gentle Senior Lady

I sing a senile serenade

I ran life's race and made the grade

I kept up with the Jones's lot

I'm still living and they're not!

I sit and rock or look at flowers

Sometimes I may stay for hours

I love love programs on TV

I dream the studs all pine for me.

My household is my family

It's Pusscat, Rex, the fish and me.

Fishing for Seniors

  Seniors are an easy catch

They don’t need to be wooed

Be sure to use the proper bait,

Large quantities of food.

Most times that will bring ‘em in

But if it’s not enough

Just chum the water round the bait

With lots of free-bee stuff

Old Folks Home

The voice of the pastor comes through

over the sounds of his congregation,

a small group of ladies who made it 

from bed to chapel for the early service.

They sit in pews close to their walkers

or wheelchairs, scoring brownie points

just in case there really is a heaven

and someone at the gate takes notes.

It doesn’t hurt to believe. If He exists

The points may be a sound investment.

Most are women who outlived their men.

They've already written their memoirs

and are patiently waiting their turn to die.

Their daily aches and pains are eased

by friends who savor detailed accounts

as part of our routine days so full of trivia

that meal times are high points of the day.

Eating is a pleasure, but chatting is better.

There's always some juicy piece of gossip

or a new death notice to share with friends.

I arrive as the service is nearly ending

The exercise program is due up next.

It was taped long ago by a resident here,

he’s dead, the man who taped the tape.

Some of the congregation has joined us.

My muscles complain against the things

The dead man tells me to make them do.

They say these exercises are low impact

I'm glad I did them when they are done.

Now it’s time for art, to paint or something.

My Electric Chair

My motorized by power chair

Was loaned to me by Medicare,

I wish it’s name was not so square

It’s really an electric chair

But you are probably aware

That executions everywhere

Are done in an electric chair

Mine just numbs my derriere.

What’s Ahead?

What will I be when I retire,

Couch potato or live wire?

In Oklahoma, so they say,

They sit watching hawks all day.

In Miami buzzards fly

Lazy circles in the sky.

Lots of people wonder why

Buzzards round our Courthouse fly

Is it hot air or dead meat?

A need to soar or call to eat.

High or hungry? They may be

Undecided just like me.